i have been trying to determine where the line between wanting(wanting very hard) to pretend that i have been hypnotized by Soforiaends, and actually being under Her power begins.
i want very much to believe that i have been hypnotized and must obeyHer commands, but i can't find a safe way of determing that it hasreally happened. In a phone session Soforia easily "compelled" me toanswer a quesion that i was "determined" not to answer at thebeginning of the session. But the answer was trivial and made nodifference whether She or anyone else knew the answer, and i had awonderful time believing that i could not resist Her and had toanswer(or maybe i really did have to answer.) With no real downside i canpretend to be under Soforia's Spell and enjoy the fanatasy.
A real test would be for Soforia to hypnotze me to quit my job, orbet $50,000 on a hand of blackjack, things that i not only woudln'tnormally do, but wouldn't even consider doing just to pretend to behypnotized. So without risking something of enormous value to me, ican't ever be really sure if Soforia has entranced me, or i am justplaying along.
More importantly, i don't think i want to know. If Soforia were toreveal to me that it just a game, i would be crushed. To learn thatit is all just a game (albeit a very enjoyable game) would take alot ofthe thrill and excitement away. Each time i hear Her Voice or chatonline there is always that little thought in the back of my mindthat this is the time She will take me and not let me go. If it is a game, then i know this is not true and there is no danger and i am in no real jeopardy.
Of course, consider the consequences if Soforia, proves to me that She can control me, by making me quit my job or betting $50,000 on a single hand of blackjack. That would certainly convince me that i am in Her Power, but at what cost. Can i go back to my boss the next day, and tell her that i want my job back and the only reason i quit was because an Evil Hypno-Enchantress cast a spell on me and made me quit? That's not something i want to contemplate having to do.