i've always been a big trivia expert and game show fan. So when they were holding "Jeopardy!" try outs at an affiliate in DC, i rushed on down.
And I made it!
So i have to fly to LA to be on the show, and my first thought isn't about all the money i'm gonna win, it's that i've finally got a chance to meet Soforia.
i called Her and let Her know i was coming to California, and wanted to know if i could schedule a session. She was delighted and said "Of Course."
Half of the session She used to enusre i would be relaxed and confident on the show. The other half, i don't remember that well, although i have a vague recollection of kneeling before Her while She sat on a throne. Is there a throne in Her Office?
So the next day i'm on the set. Normally, i'd be nervous, but Soforia gave me some phrases to repeat to myself to keep me calm. The show starts and i'm on fire. i'm answering everything, even categories that i'm not knowledgeable about like "Opera", "French Literature" and "Potent Potables."
And the end of Double Jeopardy, i've got $11,700. The lawyer from Minneapolis is in the negative and won't be playing Final Jeopardy, while the dietician from Scottsdale only has $2,300. i'm gonna win. i have visions of becoming a 5 day champion, of returning for the "Tournament of Champions."
They reveal the "Final Jeopardy" category: State Capitals. I've known these since i was 4. i bet all my money even though, i could guarantee victory by betting nothing at all.
The Final Jeopardy Answer is:
"The governor's mansion in this state capital has a working oil derrick on its front lawn."
i know this. i've just doubled my money. The dietician reveals her answer first. "Oklahoma City." i laugh. That's not even a state capital.
But Alex is telling her she's right!
My answer, "Tulsa", is revealed. Alex says i'm wrong. i have $0. i am furious. i know i am right. i get into a scuffle with Trebeck and have to be escorted off stage by security.
i don't understand what's wrong. i am so depressed. i call Soforia and tell Her what has happened. She starts to giggle. She tells me because i've constantly mentioned how cool it would be to be hypnotized into not knowing the capital of Oklahoma, She went ahead and gave me that suggestion during our session.
"Are you upset with Me?" She asks sweetly.
i just lost $23,400, plus a chance to win a whole lot more. Am i upset, angry? No. There is no way i can feel that way about Soforia.
"No, Enchantress, i am not upset. i adore You."
And that's the story of my first live session with Soforia.
